Slipper Hero

When I came home with these slippers some 10 years ago my wife didn’t believe I was serious.
”My father had a pair like that,” she said.
”So?”
”When he was young.”
”They were on sale and very cheap,” I explained.
”Nooo,” she replied dripping with sarcasm.
”The shop was going out of business.”
”You don’t say!” (More sarcasm.)
”They are very comfortable,” I explained.
”You look like an old man in those slippers.”
”The slippers change my appearance?”
”You know what I mean.”
”I’m going to be wearing them around the house. No one will see them and they feel great.”
”I’ll see them!” she replied majestically.
”Try to bear your suffering,” I said. ”I’m wearing them.”

When they first sprang a hole about a year ago, my wife said that I could finally buy a new pair.
”Why? The hole doesn’t affect their function. They feel as good as ever.”
”You can’t go around with torn slippers,” I was informed as though some law forbid it.
”They are nice to my feet and my feet love them,” I informed her. ”I shall not abandon them as long as they serve me well.” (Majestically)

”Promise me that you won’t wear the slippers when we have guests on Friday,” she said a few weeks ago.
(People take their shoes off on entering the house in Sweden and walk in their socks or wear a pair of in-house shoes or slippers.)
”OK,” I promised. ”But have you realized that these are designer slippers?”
”Designer slippers?”
”Yes, people pay good money to buy torn jeans. I have a pair of torn slippers. Can’t you see them as ultra stylish?”
”Slipper hero,” she replied and gave me a look that said it’s foolish to argue with a fool.
The insulting term ”slipper hero” in Swedish means a man who is dominated by his wife. I suspect that she’s grown to like my slippers, but she’ll never admit it.

To be continued…

“A slave of fashion is not a complete slave,
but only to the dictates of the fashionists.
They are free to be the slaves of other interests as well.”
Dartwill Aquila

(Tomorrow: Anti-fashionists)